The Gottman Method is a 40 year research based, evidence backed method for improving marriages. Dr. John Gottman can predict, with over 85% accuracy, who will still be together after 2 years based on how a couple speaks with each other. It is a very effective method to process through hurts, deepen intimacy, deepen friendship, and manage conflict.
Sex/Porn/ Love Addiction
This is where a person is mistaking sex for intimacy and begins to see sex as their most important need because they see it as being loved. Unfortunately, it becomes compulsive, and out of her control, there are negative consequences, and the person feels shame, isolation, and worthlessness. By addressing the addiction and the real issues it is masking, people can free themselves of the compulsive behaviors, and learn to love and trust themselves and other healthy people.
They learn true emotional intimacy and healthy sexuality. It is an amazing, courageous, and spiritual journey of healing.
This is especially damaging to our attachments with others and can fuel a sense of being unworthy, unlovable, or defective. Trauma includes physical abuse and neglect, emotional abuse and neglect, covert and overt sexual abuse and neglect, and spiritual abuse and neglect. Trauma causes us to freeze in our development of healthy attachments, healthy beliefs about self and others, and coping mechanisms. In therapy, we heal these wounds. We are much wiser today than we were when these events happened.
We can safely learn to examine these events, grieve the losses, and lose the shame, fear, and resentment so many victims of trauma carry. Through courageous examination, a person goes from being a victim to, not just being a survivor, but to actually thriving in a new found sense of self.
When our parents were unable to meet out emotional or physical needs in childhood, we do not securely attach to adult figures, and our trust in others, ourselves, and the world is disrupted. We become anxious or avoidant in the ways we handle relationships with others, either needing constant reassurance the person is there for us or feeling engulfed when people get too close to us. By working through these issues, we can change our attachment style to a more secure style and have healthier relationships and learn to trust ourselves and others.
Alcohol and Drug Abuse
There is nothing more frightening or depressing to a person than when they start to realize a substance or alcohol is now controlling them. The sense of failure and shame over the inability to control it can be overwhelming. Through therapy and the support of a 12 Step program, Smart Recovery, or one of many others now available, the person can develop healthier coping mechanisms, and successfully address the issues that are being masked by alcohol and substance use. The person becomes their true authentic self, and lives a much happier, fulfilling life.
Please note that Mrs. Molinaroli will not do custody evaluations, affidavits, court testimony, or disability evaluations. If that is the primary reason a person is calling, they will be referred elsewhere.
Several treatment approaches are utilized in the course of treatment and the approach depends on the individual. No one theory or therapy will work with every person. Wendy Molinaroli tailors therapy to best meet the needs of the client.
Many people report having difficulty conveying what they need, instead expressing themselves in an angry hostile way, holding on to resentments and fears, and expecting others to know what they need. I work with people to examine their beliefs about themselves, others, and the world, assess their true needs, and learn to ask for these needs in a healthy, more effective manner.
While this does have a definite genetic component to it, it does not have to rule a person. Through medication, and working on the distortions in thought, feelings and behaviors that are a result of the biochemical issue, a person can effectively manage the diagnosis and live a happy life and have good relationships with others.
Depression is living in the past, wishing you could give yourself a better past, and anxiety is living in the future that has not even happened. In therapy, we address the thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and events that cause regret, shame fear, control, and resentments that support a person remaining anxious. Through examination, a person can liberate themselves from the negative beliefs and behaviors, process past hurts, and develop healthier ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving.